Depending where you live, autumn may be in coming along nicely.  Here in the Bay Area we continue to have balmy summer weather but it is just starting to feel like the seasons are changing.  

As the weather cools down, what are some self-care activities that you gravitate towards in autumn?  Take some time this fall to enjoy the changing seasons and nurture your mental, emotional, and physical health.  Here are some small ways to enjoy fall.

• Sip hot tea
• Take a stroll and really notice the changing leaves, the colors, and the crispness in the air
• Decorate your space to bring autumn indoors
• Make spiced apple cider
• Rake the leaves
• Jump in those raked leaves
• Collect leaves on your next hike and make a collage or put them in a journal
• Read a good book
• Listen to a podcast or an audio book
• Volunteer
• Journal
• Daydream
• Take a cat nap
• Declutter one area of your house
• Donate some things that you no longer need.  
• Try a new recipe such as an autumn soup, or roast some vegetables
• Go apple picking and then make an apple pie with your favorite spices
• See if you can escape from a corn maze
• Watch your favorite movie
• Go pumpkin picking or check out the largest pumpkin grown this year
• Read ghost stories by the fire
• Go camping
• Check out a local festival
• Create a gorgeous fall wreath
• Learn a new skill
• Take a bike ride
• Learn how to knit or crochet
• Paint

     The holiday season brings varied and complex emotions: joy and nostalgia, love and loneliness.  New research helps to explain how these feelings affect us- with some practical implications for making the season brighter and more meaningful.
 
     Some people go home for the holidays hoping just to survive, burying their attention in their phones or football to avoid conflict with relatives.  Yet research now suggests that is the incorrect idea.  Family rituals, of any form, can save a holiday, making it well worth the effort of getting everyone together in the same room.

     Some research has shown that people who practiced collective rituals compared with people who did not perform them, felt closer to their families, which made the holidays more interesting and in turn, made the holidays more enjoyable.  Most surprisingly, the types of rituals that people described in the research, such as family dinners with special foods, religious ceremonies, and watching the ball drop in Times Square, did not have a direct bearing on enjoyment.  But the number of rituals did!  Apparently, having family rituals makes the holidays better and the more, the merrier.

     During the holiday season, it is natural to feel a longing for times gone by, such as a childhood spent singing carols or meals spent with now departed loved ones.  Recently, scientists have explored the bittersweet feeling of nostalgia and found that it serves a positive function by improving our mood and possibly our mental health.  The researchers found that nostalgia boosted self-continuity by increasing a sense of social connection.  Sentimental recollections, looking at photographs, cooking certain meals, sharing stories or playing music, often include loved ones, which can remind us of a social web that extends across people and across time. 
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     If you are feeling a bit discombobulated over the holidays, pull out a photo album and spend some time revisiting your past and take the time to engage with family and friends over your favorite and treasured holiday rituals.  

Most everyone loves to travel. Getting away and making trips to your favorite vacation spot for a weekend with your family is a great way to escape the stress of everyday life. However, for families who have children or teenagers with autism or Asperger's, the thought of a vacation may evoke feelings of anxiety and fear.

Traveling with children with autism may seem difficult, but when you plan your vacations ahead of time and with care, they can be an absolute treat and a great way to strengthen familial bonds.

Here are a few tips to make your vacation a pleasurable one for your child and the entire family.











​Choose an ideal destination for your child

Encourage your children to participate actively in the planning process and evaluate their current interests, attention span, sensory processing/information-processing abilities, and relate it to your upcoming trip. Choose a place where your child would still get to do activities that they typically enjoy. For example, if your child loves amusement parks, try taking them to Disneyland, if your child loves playing with water, consider planning a beach vacation. Make sure you’re not overwhelming your child by involving them in too many activities, as this would result in stressing out not just your child, but the rest of the family as well.

Arrange proper identification for your child

Parents of children with autism often struggle to manage their child’s wandering during vacations. Nearly half of children with autism tend to wander or run off, causing tremendous concern and anxiety to parents.

Here are a few identification tools you can use

• Tracking devices: Choose a suitable device that matches your child’s requirement and have your child wear it every time you are out.  Practice using the tracking device before the vacation to sort out any problems.

 

• Personal IDs: Use medical IDs for personal identification. These should include information about your child, address, and phone number and any medical information. Create a few handouts to give out, if necessary.  These handouts should contain your address and phone number as well as a picture of your child.

Predict your child’s needs

Parents can typically anticipate their child’s needs. However, this becomes even more necessary with the child with autism. This is because children with autism typically struggle to accept changes in their routine, and a vacation requires a divergence from their usual schedule. This could lead to meltdowns and anxiety attacks. To reduce such incidents from happening when traveling, here are some ideas.  Call the airline in advance to check for delays. This gives you enough time to make special accommodations.  Work with your child on the need for patience for TSA lines at the airport as well as amusement park rides.  Use social stories to help prepare your child for the trip including ordering food in restaurants, sleeping in a new bed in the hotel or resort, and tolerating long car rides.

Prepare a checklist of essentials

Prepare a checklist so you leave behind nothing that is important to your child. Always have reinforcements handy to reward your child for their good behavior. You can use soothers such as MP3 players a piece of cloth, string, or a toy to help keep your child calm.  Pack their favorite snacks, toys, stuffed animals, books and assistive communication tools.  Enlist your child's help so they can add necessary items or alert you if something is missing. 

Enact vacation scenarios with your child

Preparations for an upcoming trip should start well in advance of the trip. It is recommended to  start your groundwork at least 2-3 months before the vacation. Talk about the trip with your child every day by creating sequential picture stories of planned events and provide simple captions for each picture. Role-playing is one of the best ways to help children understand what they can expect to see while on vacation.  Having meaningful conversations about the trip with your child or teenager will help to relieve stress and reduce problematic behaviors during the vacation.

It's that time of year again!  Thanksgiving is 3 days away. The holidays are right around the corner. How are you feeling? Are you managing your stress adequately?  Do you feel prepared to handle the dizzying array of demands, like shopping, parties, baking, cleaning, entertaining, company events, and family demands?  Here are some helpful tips to manage your holiday stress.   If you are feeling sad or depressed during this holiday season, please read this blog post.

Holiday Stress-Buster Tips!

Holiday shopping

• Ask people what they want instead of scouring the earth to find the "perfect" gifts.
• Shop early, when there is more of a selection.
• Stick to your gift budget.

Planning family get-togethers

• Buy prepared foods, instead of cooking everything from scratch.
• Ask others to bring their favorite dishes.
• Cook and freeze foods ahead of time.

Scheduling time with family and friends

• Simplify holiday commitments and traditions. Discuss with your family which traditions are most important to you and to them. It's okay to re-evaluate past traditions.
• Allow time for yourself. Remember to do things that you enjoy.
• Avoid time crunches by making plans to visit some friends and family soon after the holidays.
• Don't over-schedule yourself. Allow enough time to relax and recover after visiting with others.
• Tell family members about your commitments so you are not struggling against their expectations.
• Travel after rush hour. When driving long distances, give yourself time to stop and rest.

Pausing before the holiday spread

• Avoid eating and drinking too much, especially alcoholic beverages.
• Avoid starving yourself in anticipation of eating at holiday parties. This approach can lead to eating too much of the wrong foods and more stress.
• Continue to exercise and watch your diet.

Managing your time

• Set priorities and let go of impossible goals.
• Enjoy the fruits of your labor.
• Don't spend all of your time planning activities for your family. You might end up feeling drained and unappreciated.
• Take the time you need to finish tasks that are important to you. Don't try to complete everything at once.
• Ask others, including the kids, to help you complete chores.
• Rest when your body tells you to.

I found some useful blogs that address the challenges of preparing for the holiday season when a friend or family member has autism or Asperger's.  As much as possible, break things down and do things in small steps.  Planning ahead is the best overall strategy.  I especially like the idea of wrapping up familiar toys for the child who does not like surprises (it can cause anxiety) or who gets overwhelmed easily. 

Surviving the Holidays with Autism-It is Possible!

12 Tips for Helping Individuals with Autism Have a Happy Holiday Season

Surviving Christmas Break:Tips for Parents with Kids on the Autism Spectrum

13 Holiday Survival Tips For Your Child With Special Needs